Sunday, February 3, 2013

Our relationship with our wife

Come home after a hard day at work and the dinner’s not ready, the house is a mess, and the kids are screaming. What do you do?

How do we treat our wives?

https://www.lds.org/topics/family-proclamation

https://www.lds.org/handbook/handbook-2-administering-the-church/families-and-the-church-in-gods-plan?lang=eng#1.3.1

Mosiah 3:19

POV Dyer-gram
- men look at how far they’ve come
- women see how far they have to go
- need to help each other see alternative perspective

The perfect woman does not exist. “Even if she did, she wouldn’t want you!” Woman helps perfect the man and the man helps perfect the woman. - President Dyer Zone Conference 6/8/00

Where are some pitfalls in the marriage relationship?
In what ways does the adversary skew the roles of husband, wife, father, and mother?
Playing “my life sucks more” and other stupid games of one-upmanship
Don’t assume you know motivation behind words/actions
Not trying to fix everything
It’s not 50/50, it’s 100/100!

How do we improve things?
How do we nurture that relationship?
Choose to love. Love the verb, not love the feeling
Counseling
Serve to love - you value that for which you sacrifice
Zone Conference 10/14/99

  1. No contention, not even in the heart
  2. We all want to be good spouses and parents
  3. We can only change ourselves (don’t carry around lists)
  4. Mental list of things we admire
  5. Companionship is 100%/100% proposition
Validation of feelings and effort
Grandpa Bob's advice - compliment her regularity

Valentine's day
Make it count! Your quality of life is directly proportional to the happiness of your wife.
Memorize Mosiah 3:19

Course manuals:
https://www.lds.org/manual/marriage-and-family-relations-instructors-manual
https://si.lds.org/bc/seminary/content/library/manuals/institute-student/eternal-marriage-student-manual_eng.pdf